Lots and lots of work has fallen to the way side. She will go home if I tell her to. I can have days or even weeks because our friendship is strong and she wants wants me to be successful.
I've lost too many friends when I folded back into myself so that I could write.... Friends ignored for too long, will fill the time they once spent with their writer friend on other activities. From there it doesn't take long for a friend to be a friend that you see once a month, which becomes once every couple of months and then it becomes somebody you plan to have coffee with but you've got this and that, and they've got this and that ,too, so the coffee doesn't happen. When it's all said and done, you're just friends on Facebook.
Friendship and writing are two activities that are ever so hard to balance. These days, I'm trying not to sacrifice one for the other. But, at the risks of sounding like a broken record, it effing hard.
And I realized something. When friend shares your dream they want to help even if only in small ways. Looking at this now, in words, I feel like a fool for not seeing that before. Obviously, not every friend can be in a writer's life in this way. But the ones who can, are are such blessings.
This is a long way of saying that, today, as I was getting annoyed with my friend, I realized the solution was simple: a second laptop. While I loathed to spend the money, I realized it would remove the greatest obstacle in our friendship. Now we can go to coffee shops and work on things together, take breaks together and procrastinate together. Granted, in the end, she may end up using the computer to play solitaire, but her work product is not the point.
Like the good friend that she is, she understood all of this and more, and gladly agreed to work after we get off work tomorrow (and everyday after). She only made one caveat: tofu* dinner first.
And I realized, that perhaps every writer needs drop box and a second laptop for friends and family who want to be in their lives. Perhaps, this idea of writing with the door closed, is a good idea, but perhaps including people is also a good idea. If you're writing in a room and a friend is with you, it can be ever so good simply because you're with a friend.
Thoughts? Please share them in the comments below.
Mariel R. is an ESL teacher, horse trainer, writer, editor, sporadic blogger, and lover of beer. She lives in South Korea with two house cats, three horses, a German Shepherd and three barn cats .
Bear (Gom in Korean) then (above) now (below)
Geumbi (Goldy in English) R.I.P February, 23, 2018